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concupiscience
18 March 2011 @ 07:21 pm
I come up with facebook statuses from time to time that would:
a) offend 1/4 or more of my fb friends
b) qualify as TMI
c) reveal the spiteful and malicious side of my nature
d) bore people to tears
e) all of the above

So here's the solution. I'm going to post them here, with the new tag "fbfail" for my hearty and forgiving LJ friends. Stay tuned!
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concupiscience
30 December 2010 @ 07:16 pm
Those of you who are friends with me on facebook know this already. My twin sister Amy has died. It was brutal, bloody murder. She was shot 4 or more times by a mentally ill person - her partner's sister. The murderer had visited my sister's house for more than a week, going to movies, playing video games, enjoying pizza and going out to dinner. When she left my sister's house, she told Amy's partner that she thought their relationship was great, and that Amy was really nice. This was on a Tuesday.

When Amy arrived at work on that Thursday, the murderer was there at her work parking lot. As Amy opened her car door, the murderer shot her with a 44.

Amy's wounds were cared for by a co-worker who was an EMT. Emergency services were called and when they arrived, Amy walked, supported, to the gurney. She told her friend who was there to keep holding her hand. She was rushed to the hospital, where she was immediately put into surgery that lasted 6 hours. They did not close up her wounds because her stats were too low. Nobody was admitted into the critical care unit to see her. They did not allow her partner in to the room to see her, or our uncle who lives in the area.

When I finished work that day, I got a message to immediately call my mom and called my mom and dad back. I got the worst news of my life. My twin star was in critical condition and she could die. I didn't know the severity of the injuries at this point.

When I got home, I bought the quickest ticket to Detroit I could find, and within a few minutes my boyfriend whisked me off to the airport. My heart was in my stomach. The flight was delayed, but I got on a slightly later flight. I took a taxi directly to the hospital. I went to the emergency room (because the main hospital was closed and visiting hours were over) and gave them my sister's name. They said they had not heard of this person. I called my uncle, who said that was the right hospital and that all I had to do was follow the signs to the critical care unit. The doors to the rest of the place were locked. Finally I reached Amy's partner PJ on the phone. He had stopped home for his cell phone charger. When we got there, they wouldn't admit to him that Amy was there either, and when pressed, security kicked us out. We were not allowed to wait in the ER waiting room.

PJ brought us back to their house. I alternately slept and shook, comforted by 2 chihuahuas and a cat. The next day, it seemed things had been sorted out. I was given a family password to be let in to see Amy.

I was the first person to see her after her surgery. She was unconscious, and had been given a paralytic agent to keep her from shaking and creating more internal damage or ripping her stitches. I held her hand and I spoke to her and told her to fight. I told her how much I loved her and how much our family loves her, how much her friends cherish her, and how much joy she brings to the world. I begged the powers that be to keep our Amy alive. I gave the nurse permission to have the hospital priest do the sacrament of the sick. I told Amy it doesn't have to be "big man in the sky" but it could be blessing of Gaia. At that point they still wouldn't let PJ into the room because according to the nurse our mom didn't provide authorization and she needed to get face-to-face authorization from mom because PJ wasn't a relative. Yeah, just only her partner for 10 years. And I vouched for him, but no deal.

In a couple hours, Mom, Dad, Jenny arrived on a flight from AK. They got to talk to Amy as well and gave permission for PJ to come in. We waited. We got to see Amy again. We decided to check in at a hotel, then come back after we had dinner - nobody had had any substantial food that day. Well, we were sorry we left, because PJ called back to say the Dr on call wanted to speak with us. We rushed back. The doctor brought us into the chapel. He said he refused to give Amy CPR...because her chest was open they'd have to do a heart massage technique. he said she'd already gotten 3 times the amount of drugs people get when they are critical and they "code". He said it was time to let her go and say goodbye. So we went and saw Amy. We sang to her. We talked to her and said goodbye. I looked up at the ceiling, knowing she was looking down on us. We praised her for fighting as long as she did - waiting to see her partner, her parents and sis from AK and me. The doctor said he'd never seen injuries so severe. It was a Miracle that she lasted longer than the first initial impact...he said she was stronger than anyone. She just couldn't pull out of it, she wasn't stable enough to have more surgeries, and there was little to no chance that her brain could function. There was little to no chance that she would not have to eat through a tube. There was little chance of her living a productive life. She is now a spark of light. She can go anywhere she wants. She can sit on all our shoulders at the same time. She is sad she can't hug us, but she's with us. She lived life beautifully.

Nobody had any indication that the murderer had anything against Amy. She told the police she thought Amy had murdered PJ and her elderly mother (who passed away alone due to natural causes) and that she was worried that Amy would harm PJ, the love of her life. She didn't mention anything about her fears to PJ. She is a mentally ill person, who had never committed a violent act before - and she must be in her early 50's because PJ is 45. We are all stunned that anyone could harm such a wonderful beautiful spirit as my sister. She's my twin star, and she's with the stars instead of us.

I'm having a bad life right now, but my sweetheart is helping me and being super supporting and wonderful.

Keep me in your thoughts and prayers.
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concupiscience
12 November 2010 @ 10:32 am
I woke up in the middle of last night after a dream...

In the dream there were insects flying all over the place. There was a person who could get rid of the insects (harmful - from how I felt) and they were creating something, a spell in the air just in front of the person's forehead. It was a glowing, orblike structure composed of bars and joints (not a solid sphere). I activated it by singing a high C note. When I sang the note, I knew the spell would rid the place of the bugs.

And I woke up with a headache. It felt like that difficult to get rid of headache - sinus problem. I took a decongestant (although the congestion was deep inside my head) and put on a breathe-right strip, then went back to bed. I had a rough time falling asleep. When I did, I had another dream.

One of my family members, Aunt B, was telling me of the provisions of my inheriting "her house". Now, I didn't know where she was talking about, seeing as she lived/lives in NY and SC. I didn't necessarily want to move either place, seeing as my sweetie lives right here in WI! I was a little anxious about that. Anyway she wanted me to perform tests. I do not recall these exactly. I remember having a cigarette in my mouth (yuck) and having it burn down all the way to the filter. The other part of the dream is more interesting...I was in the house of a client. A japanese man living in the states (it's important to note that I only visited private homes in Korea, not Japan). The house was absurd, and elegant. I was given a small handful of pills. Each was a different shape. One was shaped like one of those bright-yellow banana candies, looked just like it. I thought of it as a pill anyway. I took the pills. My colleague was given the pills and set them on the railing of the grand stairway. We sat in the japanese man's room. And he said "go into the adjoining office" I looked at the foot of his bed, setting aside the "home massage" device and having a chuckle about that, and stepped into the small closet at the foot of the bed. I asked "is _this_ the office?" and he said it was not, laughing at my ignorance. He pointed to the wall at the side of the bed, at what looked like a cupboard to me, of about 2ftx2ft. He pushed the bottom of the panel and it swung in. Average sized adults would have no problem shimmying through. I said, "sure, now that I know where it is I can go inside." He told me no, instead he'd show us "the back way" and I suspected it was the way for westerners, gaijin. I wanted to just go in the passageway, but my immediate superior told me just follow the instructions. We all (about 4 people) shuffled along and got to the head of the staircase. A hugely fat co-worker (I don't know this person) grabbed the rail and started barreling down the steps at top speed. We followed. At the top of the stairs, I saw my co-worker's pile of pills he'd set down. I was running my hand on the rail and some of the pills plummeted in the area downstairs. We noticed a grandmotherly looking woman and a young child of about 6 walking up from the bottom. Oddly, the fat man tripped and his actions caused a number of the pieces (slats- what are they called?) to break, splintering violently. the rest of the co-workers (including me) following the fat man were also going speedily. I wondered if I'd have the ability to stop myself in time (I was holding on to the rail, the splinters would hurt me) and I wondered if the fat man would fall onto the grandmother and child.

That's when I woke up, still with a headache, and a crushed ear and dead-asleep arm. Hm.

I'm much improved with a little coffee. The sub I ordered for brunch just arrived, so maybe this headache will be banished with food.
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concupiscience
11 September 2010 @ 07:01 pm
1 or 2 cans corn, drained
2 large tomatoes, diced (can also used diced canned)
2 cans black beans, drained/rinsed
1/4-1/2 chopped yellow or white onion
1 tbsp canola oil
3-5 tbsp lime juice
chili powder
cumin
coriander powder
salt
cayenne

Mix all solid ingredients with spices to taste. Personally, I add more cumin and coriander than anything else. Add 1-2 cut up ripe avocadoes and stir in if planning to eat immediately, or cut up and add just before eating otherwise.

Serve a few spoonfuls of the salad mixture on a warmed flour tortilla with some sour cream. You could also add lettuce, shredded cheese or what have you. Some people enjoy this with chopped fresh cilantro, but I despise the fresh herb, so I omit this.

Bon appetit!
 
 
concupiscience
04 August 2010 @ 10:36 am
2 large yellow onions (saute in a few tbsp olive oil)
When onions are a little cooked, add 3 or 4 cloves minced garlic and stir.
Add 1.5 chopped grn peppers, and 1.5 chopped red peppers.
cook all until tender/crisp.
add a couple cups water and a bouillion cube
Add 2 cans drained/rinsed kidney beans and 2 cans diced "chili style" tomatoes.


seasonings
chili powder (take it easy on the chili powder)
cumin (more cumin than chili pdr)
salt (only a little. veg bouillion and canned vegs are already salty)
black pepper
red pepper flakes
coriander (ground)
a few shakes hot sauce
5-10 jalapeno rings, chopped fine

When chili has "melded" (this takes about an hour of semi-constant stirring) add a bag of veggie crumbles (simulates ground beef). Make sure veggie crumbles are heated past 160F.

If chili needs thickening, add a tbsp or more tomato paste.

Serve chili with a sprinkle of co-jack cheese and buttered cornbread muffins.
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concupiscience
19 July 2010 @ 06:34 am
I was at a britney spears concert for some reason. I was walking around backstage, high above stage level though. There was a little apartment with a fully stocked fridge, there was a desk and chair, etc.

I walked through a graffiti'd door, and there were the rows of chairs leading up to the stage, angled. I stood on the top of one chair (on the back of the chair) and leapt from chair back to chair back in great swoops (gliding/flying) until I reached the very edge of the stage. As the final approach, I was going to try to do a cartwheel or roundoff, but I remembered at the last moment I didn't know how to do that, so I instead posed like a little girl curled to go to sleep. The BS artist applauded me after she cartwheeled to my position near stage right. She had chopped off skanky looking hair.

Leaving the theatre, I found a plane ticket folio that included tickets to go to the movies - like 6 of them printed on an itinerary. weird.

another part of dream I was in the bathtub and some of my family members rudely barged in while I was nekkid but I don't think they saw anything, I was quick.

another part of the dream, making some sort of butterscotch candy from shoes. Hm.
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concupiscience
15 July 2010 @ 07:31 am
In my dream, I was visiting my best college pal who was going to get married. Relatives and friends were arriving from all over to visit. Before the large group of people arrived, my friend took me aside and smooched me on the couch. I've never met his fiancee (IRL, only GF) but I think she walked in near the end of the smooch and was pissed. I would normally not kiss someone who had a sweetie even if I was single! But it was a nice dream kiss. The GF had giant sunglasses with rhinestones on the arms of the glasses. She might have also been wearing an honest-to-goodness flannel shirt.

Another group of people walked in looking a little worse for wear. Turns out there was a minor incident with a beehive and some people had to run, some people had some stings.

My older half sis was there, and my twin was there, they had a brief exchange about leaving early tomorrow morning to AK. Older half sis said something in Spanish which I didn't understand a moment. I assumed she said something like "I am now in the waiting area for the bathroom" because she was sitting on a small stool right by the bathroom door.


He/friend showed me a piece of paper that said: Toronto wedding is off. (I assumed that meant his wedding was going to be in Toronto and that it was cancelled and he would tell me why later)

On the tv in the room, there was a representation of braille on the screen. It looked real. It was a trick though, since they cannot send bumps/dots over airwaves. They intimated that if you touched your flatscreen after that, you were Fail. Weird practical joke your tv plays on you?

In another branch of dreams, I was walking down a long forested road. Every now and again, there'd be a group of businesses. It felt Alaskalike. I stepped into them and one was a bar and grill. I was trying to decide what I wanted for dinner (guess i'd gone to bed hungry). Most of the selections were not a good choice, but I think I was going to go for a shrimp/rice dish.
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